Flashback

I was surfing through TV channels yesterday and had to laugh at what I landed on. Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey! As I sat there giggling at them reciting Every Rose Has it's Thorn to get into heaven, I had a major flashback. There was a time when I wasn't an uptight control freak mom. There was a time when I thought that stupid movies were funny. There was a time when I cut school just to ride around in cars. I started to think of a simpler time. When my meals and living expenses didn't come out of my own pocket. When the only person I was responsible for was myself. I miss that time. I guess getting in touch with a few old friends lately has made me think of this, and what I miss about being young. Not that I am that old, but when the kids I teach in sunday school were born the year after I graduated I am not exactly young anymore. I have to admit that I probably wouldn't repeat that age again but there are things I do miss. The freedom from worry. Like what happens if my house catches on fire, or my husband looses his job, or one of my kids get hurt. I miss only worrying about meeting my curfew, or when my homework is due. Maybe it is a mid life crisis, but I thought only men did that. Like most people, I would say that if I knew then what I know now things would be different, but if that was the case would I be where I am now? I like where I am now. I wouldn't want that to change. Maybe if I hadn't made some of the bad or good decisions that I made then I wouldn't be the person I am today. I don't think I would like that. It took me a long time to come to the realization that I like who I am, and I shouldn't try to be someone I am not. I learned that some time in my teenage years and something I did along the way cemented that in my brain, and made me a lot stronger. I guess what I am saying is that nostalgia is a great thing in small doses.